solitary students

I remember that as a child I had to learn the multiplication table and that it took me a very long time to learn it. The reason was that I have always been an introverted learner. I don’t mean an introverted person (but that too) but that as a learner I need to process information at my own pace and time. This means I’m naturally weak at group brainstorming (unless I’m leading) because I’m not that good at thinking on my feet. I’m good at improvising but that’s because I know what to do with what I know and have a strong imagination. I’m not good at learning in groups or by having someone show me how to do something and then have them guide me. I’d rather be told what I need to know, or better yet, to be shown where I can access the information I need in order to learn/understand/do something and then work on my own until I figure it out. So as child, I learned better if I was left alone. In fact, I was a vocal student in primary school and my teachers were happy to have me in the class during school inspections because I knew stuff. But I became very stubborn and inflexible if I felt I was being pushed.
As a child, I had to go all the way to the front of the classroom and recite the multiplication table and that scared me and I always froze. My dad tried to help me and we were meant to learn it together. This put me under enormous pressure and I still remember how scared I was and how difficult it was for me to actually learn the damn table. My dad would ask: what’s 7 times 7? what’s 12 times 11? And I was supposed to interact with him and give him the answers and we were meant to do this in real time. This simply wasn’t how I learned.

And now as a teacher I wonder if I’m doing the same to those few students who learn like I do. The school system favours extroverted learners and group work. As a teacher I try to ensure that every student in the classroom is learning and so I examine their performance in a number of ways, one of which is by trying to get them to show me what they know. And I cringe at the thought that I’m harming some of them by making them externalise their knowledge in a way that’s unnatural to them. And perhaps even discouraging.

Sometimes I’m so concerned with making sure that no student is left behind that I forget that some students need to be left alone (and how do I discern those from the ones that maybe do need a little more encouraging?) Aside: doesn’t this sound a bit like an answer to the notorious interview question: what’s your biggest flaw at x, or, what do you need to work on?

SF story

I wrote a short SF story and submitted it to a competition. I never heard back which I take it means my entry wasn’t taken up. But, at least I wrote something with the explicit purpose of publishing it and at least it’s a start. Before Isaac Asimov became the awesome SF author that he was, he received many a rejection letters. He kept at it, under the well known guidance and support of John W. Campbell and it’s a good thing he did! So, to many more rejections to come : ) Here is my first entry. It’s meant to be set 100 years in the past which was meant to deal with the environment and ecology but I thought it’d be much cheesier and cool if the aliens came instead:

Some people expected the aliens to come. For most, it would have been a shock if the Maker hadn’t severed emotional responses to those unable to make the transition. The Maker almost never interfered in the evolution of a species but all linear time lines converged on this one: humanity was doomed. The damage to their planet was too severe and the humans’ development too slow to allow for any collective action that could have reversed the deterioration of their habitat and their souls.

From those who made it, some opted to join the census. They then became part of the universe’s library of Anomalous Species Before The Transition. Their consciousness could not transcend their bodily limitations but at least it could be maintained. Choice for body ownership was free.
There was at any rate no guarantee that anyone from the selected would (could) transcend their body. This required hard work and training.

The humans lived in linear time and their bodies’ lifetime was extended approximately every fifty years, for as long as needed. Three generations later, a few managed to master the lower arts: telepathy, telekinesis, empathy. It wasn’t much, but it was a start. A transitioning life form was assigned the humans as part of its own training. It used dreams and the subconscious to train them. In their dreams, humans learned how to eliminate the Ego through meditation. The dream sessions were sometimes brutal. There was a history of collective and individual pain that had to be embraced before any progress could be made. A minority, who were still attached to their bodies, violently resisted the life form’s training. They became schizophrenics and had to join the census. But many humans perceived it as a guardian angel. For others still, it was a completely internalised voice which spoke to their hearts and told them Truth. Those made the most progress.

It was the year 2119 for the humans, and they were one step closer to becoming Gods.

do your fucking job!

Perhaps this illustrates the attitude many hold towards those of us who teach English as a foreign language somewhere abroad (like China!). When I was visiting Cyprus this Summer my brother offered to pay for some drinks, jokingly adding, “you don’t reallly have a job yet”. It sums up how many people feel about this kind of work, both from the outside and sadly, from the inside.
There are, unfortunately, many a young soul, who think that because they can probably get away with it, they might as well not bother taking their jobs seriously. They are also often the more popular teachers because they take all the shortcuts. They play games and have fun with the students. They feed them the answers and let them babble on in their native language. The children thoroughly enjoy their time with their pal, the teacher, and the parents are happy because their children are happy. Never will a child come home upset because they were scolded in class for misbehaving. They won’t find homework challenging, and they won’t have to bother with the nitty-gritty stuff. The teacher can cope with a hangover very well thank you. Just have them do some arts and crafts. Play a couple of games, go through the motions and we’re done!
Not only do you get away with this style of “teaching” but you are rewarded for it. Private English schools are first and foremost businesses and the management aims to keep the paying clients satisfied. This is what I was told during the Summer when I turned 16 and took a Summer job at M&S: The client is always right.

This is what may happen if you inherit a class from one of these sorry excuses for a teacher. You find that your class in under par. You will seek to implement strategies to amend this. You will focus on major areas of weaknesses and implement revision in each class and start using homework as a way to further address this issue. You will train your students to listen, and focus. You will train your students to start working independently. You will most probably incorporate much more reading and writing than your students have come to expect. Sometimes, you may have to teach your students how to read and write. You will try to have as much play as possible in your class but probably less than you would like to because you keep playing catch-up.
You students will have to work and they won’t like it.

And so begins the backlash. Little Johny complains to mummy that the teacher is working him too hard. Little Mary hasn’t done her homework and cries her eyes out and her mummy says: there there, I’ll talk to your teacher baby, don’t you worry. Parents complain to management and start giving you friendly suggestions about how you could improve your teaching. Perhaps, more speaking and less writing?

And what of the joy of learning? Teaching your child to perservere? Trusting me to do my job? How about I track down that father fucker who never did his job and has made it so difficult for me to do mine? Where is that universal feeling of love when you need it? On a fucking hangover…

fatalistic mood

I watched this video which shows this girl’s thoughtful rant addressed to a room full of bureaucrats. She basically told them that they’ve fucked up the world for everyone, that they are hypocrites, and should stop it already. The girl was honest and genuine in her communication. And I was crying throughout it. You, passer by, may not think much of this but I’m not much of a crier. However, it made me very sad to think that this girl was speaking truth to deaf ears. This must be one of the most perplexing thing about humans. No other species knowingly ignores a threat to its well-being. They are incapable of (such massive) self-deception. And here we are, bringing our children to the position whereby they feel the need to tell us (shout) the obvious. (And their children will do the same to them.)

Anyway, the environment is fucked. It’s too late. Even if it’s not too late, no collective action will be taken until it’s too late. Enjoy it while it lasts.

the egomaniac teacher. part I: the problem

My school in Dalian is contracted to provide native speakers to a Japanese state school. The classes are meant to be an addition to the normal English lessons and conversational in nature. The children also have English classes which follow the curriculum of the Japanese school system, but those do not fall under my responsibility. I understand my official role to be that of the main teacher, with a Japanese member of staff to assist me. The classes are meant to be fun for the children.

I share classes with two teachers and have no problems with one of them. We get along; it’s clear we have the interests of the children in mind; we discuss the class plan beforehand and listen to each other and accept each other’s suggestions. As a result, the classes are fun and active for the children and Japanese is kept at a minimum. The children are able to bond with me normally and respect and listen to me. They are also not confused about the nature of the class. They know when to be focused and attentive to me and when to my co–teacher and that they are expected to produce English.

The opposite seems to be the case for the classes I share with the other teacher. In those classes, the children are disinterested and unmotivated and use primarily their native language for communication and resist speaking English strongly. I have not noticed much progress in contrast to my other classes.

This teacher’s English is mediocre but insists on even drilling sentences herself which are usually either very awkward or just plain wrong. She has resisted gentle suggestion in the past and uses my lessons to do bookwork and/or teach grammar points needed for her own lessons. She uses a teacher centred methodology which consists largely in explaining and elaborating on grammar points in Japanese; drilling set sentences in English; then instructing students to write arbirtary sentences on their notebook. I hardly contribute in the class. On occasion I might manage to play a game (with a linguistic purpose of course) but this usually happens if she is late and I find myself with an opportunity to do this. She then has to allow me to continue with the game but will reign me in soon after she has joined the classroom. She will either not acknowledge my presence in the classroom or treat me like her assistant asking me read something out or to give out handouts (which I then give to a student to give out). She seems to me, to be reluctant to allow me to share the class with me. The students are confused about what my role is. I have limited opportunity to develop a rapport with them and they don’t respect me as a teacher (because I don’t get an opportunity to teach).

I have given this teacher plenty of time to get used to me and realise I’m not looking to undermine her authority and I have tried to suggest games and activities for our lessons but my input is received in a lukewarm manner and she preserves and exercises the power of veto. I am not able to do my job to the best of my abilities. I give less than I should which ought to be my best. As a consequence, I find myself demoralised and bored during these classes, along with the students.

it’s all China

Did I mention that I like it here? I was ambivalent before and although I didn’t not like it, I couldn’t affirm its opposite either. And then something happened and I started feeling comfortable in my new environment. Probably getting over the culture shock of Dalian being more Westernised than Nanning. I think it happened over dinner. I was having dinner with a co-worker discussing our new home, and then I realised as I was talking that because I’d already formulated expectations of what China is like I couldn’t adjust to the North. But one of the reasons China is exciting is that it embodies contradictions. I moved to the North because China is huge and I wanted to experience more of it and I got what I wanted. It’s all China. The minority women with their super long hair in different styles to signify status; the business women wearing Western brands and high heels; tea ceremonies and Starbucks; megacities and rural villages; street markets and huge WallMarts. I will not be done with this country anytime soon.

hello North East

Let’s move to a new city on the other edge of China. From the South West to the North East. Let’s travel for more than a day, visiting four airports. I will get stressed over weight limitations. I will buy herbs I can’t find in China and trouble myself over whether I should bring pack some cheese and proper ham and exactly how much chocolate is too much chocolate. I will say goodbye to people and hope that my mum doesn’t cry. Need magazines, books, and music. By the time I reach my final destination in China I will be sleep deprived and tired. Then I will need to adjust to a new place and make new acquaintances. I will retrieve my laptop and arrange for an internet connection. I will look to start Chinese lessons at some university there. I will look to join a sailing club and a gym club. I dread the small talk. But it must be done. Hopefully, well.