orgasmic alarm clock

The other night, well, an early morning not too long ago, I was woken up by an orgasm. I’m not usually woken up by them. In the early mornings I may be having weird sex dreams and contractions blend in with the dreams and that strange in between stage. I continue half asleep and half awake and have a faint memory of some strange phantasy scenario when I wake up. This time, I was being woken up by the contractions as they were taking place in real time. I was becoming more and more aware of my bodily sensations and I fully woke up as I orgasmed. (Well, as fully as is possible for me before coffee and a full hour of zombiehood.) I don’t remember the dream and I’m not sure there was one. But it’s a nice way to wake up : )

: )

I’m still in love with this one.
(As usual,) I discovered the scope of my feelings by inference. I had sex with someone and I’ve been feeling: longing. It’s nice when sex comes your way of course, especially those loose arrangements — ever so convenient. Still, I’ve been troubled. Because I don’t want any other man, bless me. (Still, sex is nice so let’s not close all doors.) So I’ve sent an email with the subject: “you should” and the content of: “come to see me”. A bit shocked that I did this, I added one of them stupid virtual smiles “: )” to be, supposedly, on the playful side because what I really meant to say was: “I really miss you. Come to see me.”

insight

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information:
I came like a train.
(There done.)

being in love is a Roxette song

When you’re in love, part of you is pre-occupied with the future or with the past but not the present. This is when you daydream or project into the future. Or when you go back in past shared experiences and ruminate. You find yourself listening to cheesy music (see: love songs) and skipping. I take the skipping part out of the negatives. It’s great to skip. Or to dance. In the rain. But you see what I’m on about cheesiness?

in control

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I used to date a man who couldn’t have me give him a blowjob or be on top. Control issues anyone?
I straddled my man last night and fucked him. For me, it’s not so much about being in control than it is about letting go. Tits and belly and thrusting. No concern over aesthetics.
Oh and also about being in control.

brooding

16

It expands and irritates me
this mood.
Or that I should mind.
Touchy–feeling excluded.
Lover and friend drinking.
I would have hoped for more space.
Lover and lover and friend drinking.
Instead I brood.

sensual pleasure is here to stay

Some sex has been coming my way lately and it’s good to remember this particular branch of sensual pleasure. Other kinds include running, dancing, swimming, laughing, playing. And people forget that sex — broadly construed — is one of them because they’re so damn focused on the genitalia and orgasms that they lose sight of the fact that sex is necessary because it’s a key way of interacting with one’s environment. This includes your own body but also someone else’s. It’s about movement and joy and it’s great fun.
I’ve been reminded of all this because this new guy is very comfortable with his body and for the first time in very long someone adores every inch of my body and pays attention to all of it rather than just the pussy. This helps involve the entirety of the physical body in sensual pleasure and helps remind that sex is an exercise in joy.